An annual marriage getaway? As in both of us leave town every single year? We have too much going on in our lives to commit to that!

Many couples get stuck in the weeds of everyday life and find themselves drifting away from the feeling of romance and adventure they felt when they first married. Investing in yearly marriage adventures can help reignite that spark. Can a vacation fix a broken marriage? No. But, it can bring you closer together and allow you to reconnect without the distractions of daily life.

The Escape (Actually Getting Away)

It’s been many years ago now, but I still remember the first time my husband, Greg, and I went away and left our firstborn daughter, Taylor, with friends. We weren’t just leaving her for the evening so we could enjoy a date night together; we were leaving her with them so we could get away for an overnight adventure as a married couple.

I loved being a new mum and honestly couldn’t imagine leaving my precious infant all night long. I had no idea how many mummy fears and parenting questions I would perseverate on while preparing to leave.

Would Taylor be okay in the morning with someone else greeting her when she woke up?

Were we permanently scarring our daughter by leaving her overnight?

What if Taylor developed a rare disease due to a mosquito bite and I wasn’t there to help?

I struggled with questions and fears as I considered every possible item or instruction our friends might need while we were away. I was exhausted by the time Greg and I actually executed our get-away plan and said our tearful goodbyes.

As we drove away from our friend’s home — with no one in the backseat — I began to feel overwhelmed. But out of the fog of my emotions, I recalled that prior to Taylor’s arrival, Greg and I had fun adventures and nights away. And before I knew it, I had refocused, and we were laughing and connecting like old times.

Why Plan an Annual Getaway with Your Spouse?

Over the years, Greg and I have added three more children to our family, so the planning for our annual marriage adventures can prove to be overwhelming. I often wonder if it’s all worth it — transportation for the kids, plans for meals, medical documents for an emergency — but then I remember how good these getaways are for our marriage and I know for certain … Yes, yes, yes, it’s all worth it!

Going away on an annual adventure with your spouse can be life-giving to your marriage. The shared planning and excitement of the trip away does something for a couple that nothing else can emulate. Every marriage needs this! Getting away is essential because of the daily busyness of life, the stress of work and the numerous other things that pull at time away from each other as husband and wife.

So how do you plan an annual marriage getaway? Basically, an annual getaway starts with a commitment to spending a few nights out of town together.

Consider planning a holiday to the beach, in the mountains or maybe sharing your gifts on a mission trip. An annual getaway together doesn’t mean you have to live out of your suitcase for months or out of a backpack in a third-world country (although you may choose to do that if it’s something you enjoy).

The point of planning together is to make your getaway fit your own unique marriage. And remember — half the fun of your adventure is planning it together.

How an Annual Getaway Can Benefit Your Marriage

There are so many benefits to sharing adventure with your spouse. Consider that time away together can provide the following:

  • fill you with hope for the future
  • give you confidence that as a couple you can leave the comfort zone of your daily life
  • provide an opportunity to dream together and work as a team

Ultimately, your shared annual adventure will breathe new life into your relationship as you experience the thrill of doing something uncertain, daring or exhilarating. Call it what you want — just do it together!

So start planning now. As couples, we often think that our marriage can wait — wait until the kids are grown and gone, wait until the perfect financial picture appears, wait until we retire — but that’s simply not true. This year, don’t let the opportunity to reconnect through adventure pass you by.

Date night is great, but getting away as a couple is also good for your marriage. As you look at the year ahead, what will be your next annual adventure with your spouse? Rekindle the romance you felt early in your dating relationship by doing something new and exciting together.

© 2016, 2023 Focus on the Family. Used with permission. Originally published at

Erin Smalley

Erin Smalley serves in the Marriage and Family Formation department at Focus on the Family. She is a co-author of The Wholehearted Wife.

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