Kindness is "goodness in action." You spouse has areas in his or her life where they need to see your kindness. Are you willing to give it?

Getting Started

  • Watch today’s Marriage Meditation video.
  • Read today’s Marriage devotion.
  • Share today’s question with your spouse.

Today’s Video

Today’s Devotion

Scripture Reading


Real life is messy. Our world is messy. And yes, even our marriages can be messy.

What’s the right response to all the messiness, pain and need?

“The fruit of the Spirit is … kindness.” Maybe that’s not the first response that comes to mind, but it’s how Jesus responded to messiness and need. Matthew 8:1-4 tells the story of a man who asked Jesus to heal his disease. The man suffered from leprosy — a skin disease — and was considered an outcast. An untouchable. Old Testament laws commanded extreme “social distancing” for victims. Lepers were shunned, isolated and forced to live outside of cities. Should they venture into the city, they were required by law to shout “unclean” as a warning to others. Lepers were not allowed to worship in the Temple.

When the man with leprosy asked Jesus to make him “clean,” he was asking for more than physical healing. He was asking Jesus to restore his health, relationships and access to God. The Bible tells us that Jesus did that — and more. Jesus willingly — and intentionally — stepped into the man’s messiness, touched him (a severe health risk and a violation of Old Testament law) and made him whole.

The fruit of the Spirit is kindness. Kindness is goodness that meets the need.

What does your spouse need? Where are the “messy” areas of his or her life? We’re not talking about those things you might think need improvement. We’re talking about the messy situations your spouse deals with at work, at church and in their relationships. Where does your spouse need you to show kindness — goodness that meets the need?

Kindness, the Bible says, is tenderhearted and forgiving, showing others the grace God has shown us. It’s a big challenge. But remember, kindness is a fruit of the Spirit. It’s God-powered behaviour. With His power at work in you, you can step into your spouse’s messy world, show them kindness and grow closer together as a couple.


Heavenly Father, thank you for your willingness to step into our messy lives and show us kindness. Help me show the same kindness to my spouse every day.

Today’s Question

What is your spouse’s greatest need today and how can you show kindness to him or her?

More Resources

Changing Your Relationships Through the Power of Kindness.
Saying ‘I Love You’ With Random Acts of Kindness.

© 2020 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. Used with permission. Originally published at

Bill Arbuckle

Bill Arbuckle is a content producer for the Marriage team at Focus on the Family.

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